Wherever
we go, we have the opportunity to learn and teach. What we learn
is sometimes not as important as how we learn it. The method of
learning can have a different impact on us. If the lesson is:
"Do not trust strangers", for example, how we learn can have
a dual impact. If we are hurt physically by our trust, we
experience the pain twofold. We learn that we cannot trust
strangers and that anyone can become a stranger and hurt us.
What we do is transfer our hurt to an unsuspecting person. We
mantle then with the cloack of preconcieved wrongs which they have not
inflicted. This is the most unfair to both involved. This
is the pain from the original hurt that has the longest lasting
concequesnces. If we do not face our pain to see from where it
is coming, it will stay with us and not let go. If goes with us
everywhere, affecting our actions and reactions to people and
circumstances. And so, it cripples us. We have to learn
that not letting go of the pain keeps it with us and we hug it close
to us as if it were a security blanket - and indeed it is. It
keeps us in the secure position of not having to face ourselves and
taking the responsibility of making us whiole.
It is a challenge every day to keep a realistic view of ourselves
and your motives. We can only preserve in our search for self
truth.
Self Esteem...A Healthy Response To
Life (day 20)
Self-esteem is a response to life. We all have
the same chance at a healthy view of ourselves at the moment of
conception. From there on in, it can be altered. The
environment in which we are nurtured alters our
circumstances.
The big questions is: how can we attain self-esteem
when it has not been in our awareness? Self - esteem is not only
a response to life, it is a learned response to life. It follows
that if it can be learned, it can be unlearned. A lesson is
unlearned and a new one can take its place. Estimation for
yourself cannot be handed over like a gift. It would rob the
person in need of it at the very chance of attaining it. It is
in the doing of kind acts for ourselves that self-esteem is
built. There is no easy path. We have to start with a
premise. The premise is that we are made in the likeness of
good. This is what we must relearn. The kind acts that I
speak of are those things you allow into your being. If you do
not allow negative people and situations to alter tour
self-perception, it is much easier to remain positively kind to
yourself. This kindness towards yourself has nothing to do with
selfishness. If is gentle loving kindness towards someone you
love and would keep from harm. A thing learned becomes
habit. To develop a habit we must practice it. Surround
yourself with loving people and ideas. Be as kind to yourself as
to a friend. Think of yourself as your own best friend.
That is where your greatest potential for healthy self love lies.
Wherever
we go, we have the opportunity to learn and teach. What we learn
is sometimes not as important as how we learn it. The method of
learning can have a different impact on us. If the lesson is:
"Do not trust strangers", for example, how we learn can have
a dual impact. If we are hurt physically by our trust, we
experience the pain twofold. We learn that we cannot trust
strangers and that anyone can become a stranger and hurt us.
What we do is transfer our hurt to an unsuspecting person. We
mantle then with the cloack of preconcieved wrongs which they have not
inflicted. This is the most unfair to both involved. This
is the pain from the original hurt that has the longest lasting
concequesnces. If we do not face our pain to see from where it
is coming, it will stay with us and not let go. If goes with us
everywhere, affecting our actions and reactions to people and
circumstances. And so, it cripples us. We have to learn
that not letting go of the pain keeps it with us and we hug it close
to us as if it were a security blanket - and indeed it is. It
keeps us in the secure position of not having to face ourselves and
taking the responsibility of making us whiole.